Cultivating Adaptable Boundaries

Share this article with your friends and family

Boundaries are a complicated subject. We refer them in different contexts all the time without having an embodied understanding of what it really means to hold a boundary, or how to create them.

I need better boundaries. I’m always getting taking advantage of.

I’m so tired, but it’s my own fault. I say yes to everything.

When I lead my horse to the arena, he walks all over me like I’m not even there.

At the heart of it, a defined boundary of the self is a fundamental property of every living organism. In order for us to be able to move through the world in a balanced and regulated way, we need to be able to differentiate ourselves from our environment; to know what is ours and what is “other”; to be clear on what we want and what we don’t want; to viscerally feel and be clear on what is acceptable to us and what is not.

When that definition is clear, our system is able to organically create a space between us and the world that allows us to filter our experiences and hold our own integrity and energy.

Not an armor that blocks everything out (and at the same time doesn’t let anything in).

Not a barrier so indistinct that we can no longer tell what’s ours and what’s yours, what feels good and what doesn’t, what’s intuition and what’s projection.

But a clear sense of self in relationship to our environment that allows us to be distinct and rooted in our own being.

It’s only once we have a clear and felt sense of differentiation that true, conscious integration is possible; with our horses, on a community level and globally.


❤️ Jane

Want to learn more about increasing your capacity for big emotions, energies, and experiences with your horse? Make sure you register for my free Presence, Power & Partnership Workshop at the end of this month! 👇🏻

Have you checked out the Confident Rider Podcast? Don’t forget to subscribe to the show and share if you enjoyed it! The podcast is available on iTunes, Soundcloud, Google Play and Spotify.

Subscribe to The Confident Rider Podcast 🎧 below and discover why thousands of other riders are tuning in each week!

Join me for a free, 21-day challenge to incrementally expand your comfort zone and put some daily deposits in your Brave Bucket!