You are not entitled to success.
You are not entitled to things working out.
A horse, even one you label as your own, neither requires nor demands you to continue being a horse. They have fulfilled their remit by virtue of who they are. They have nothing to prove- to you or to themselves.
You are not entitled to their attention, nor the attention of others.
It is us alone with the questions, the appeals. But the answers, the filling in of all the blanks, is not something that is promised to us.
It is a decision, an adventure, we open ourselves up to, to occupy a third space, that is neither solely human nor solely horse. Instead, it is a little bit of both, and something of another we are unable to grasp fully or identify.
The space of a horseperson.
Horses make no appeals that we dance with our shadow side. That we reconcile our need for control. That we meet the lingering fears born of a body we occupied for decades previous creating an atmosphere of concern in our cells. That we elasticise the borders of a comfort zone preferring to identify as stone.
It is a life with horses that asks this, requires this.
You can make your way through life experiencing success, even happiness, without ever meeting any of these things.
But if it’s a life with horses that you want, the space of a horseperson you want to occupy, then at some point you will find you need to face yourself within a conversation that calls to reach for something deeper than you initially present.
But your horse makes no demands for it.
—
Jane
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