What do we feel we need, to be ready to begin?
Which we could rephrase as, what’s getting in the way of us starting?
This question I always find to be a thorny one to answer, not because of the obvious nuance that’s real and present in a human life, but because of all the ways that we argue against ourselves. We have a fierce and fast tendency to rise to the defence of all the reasons why we can’t do the thing that we want to do, which can make for sticky conversations as we start to unpick why that might be the case.
If you feel yourself bristling, perhaps you can identify.
The reality is, to get started, you need practically nothing except the willingness to do so and the commitment to taking some form of action. This is true regardless of your start point, financial resource or current state of health and wellbeing. And that’s because the art of “getting going” can be reduced to a startlingly simple equation:
Getting Going = Decision + Action
The acceptance of where you’re at and figuring out what’s possible within what’s possible. Which is going to be different for all of us. Identifying the next available step and taking it.
So why, for many of us, is this such a hard thing to do?
Here’s a pick’n’mix assortment of common things I see getting in people’s way.
1. You’re waiting for it to be easy, or at least ‘easier’.
Easy or hard, it doesn’t matter. If you are creating momentum where there is none, or doing something that is currently outside your skillset or comfort zone, then there’s no way around it other than committing to some form of action. Doesn’t have to be huge, and it’s not about putting yourself in an unsafe position. But it most probably is going to involve some sort of sacrifice.
You are going to have to NOT do something else to do the thing you want. You are going to have to say no to other things and realise that there is some level of hardship involved to committing.
It has rewards, but they aren’t necessary instant. You have to give yourself time. But the only person who can bridge the space between doing and not doing is you.
2. You somehow think there’s going to be an energy shift and you’ll naturally be compelled to do ‘the thing’.
This isn’t about forcing or pushing through. Again, it’s about finding what’s possible within what’s possible. Which will change from day to day, moment to moment.
I can speak to this endlessly from the level of the nervous system, but it can be useful also to consider it from the point of energetics.
Consider things elementally: earth, air, fire and water. Earth is heavy, grounded, lacks movement. Someone lacking motivation, get up and go might need to consider how to introduce more fire, emotionally, nutritionally, functionally.
Conversely, anxiety is predominantly air. A head detached, floating away. Ungroundedness, concern. How do we earth, how do we ground?
How can you balance your natural, elemental tendencies? How can you create a system of support that naturally includes a movement towards taking action?
3. You are getting too far ahead of yourself.
Showing up and getting started is surprisingly easy. What often stops us is the attachment to showing up and getting started *in a specific way*. If you are attached to how things have to be or how they need to look (hello perfectionist and control patterns) then you are going to have a hard time motivating yourself to get out of the literal and metaphorical gate.
Beginning is just that: beginning. It’s not beginning perfectly or having it all together. It’s acceptance. This is the start point. What’s possible from here?
What to chatter about what I’ve shared above? I’m more than happy to ping some thoughts around. Let me know below!
xx Jane
