On Robbing Yourself Of Joy

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Yesterday, I booked in for a dressage lesson in a week’s time and a working cow clinic not long after that. Truth be known, I had been considering booking in for the lesson for a couple of weeks but had avoided sending the email based on the fact that… I was afraid something might go wrong.

The last 12 months, things have been a bit stop-start with Nadia. We’ve worked through a bout of allergies, thrown in a couple of abscesses, added a dash of a couple of other random things, and finally- finally- I feel like we are getting our groove on.

It feels great and I’m marinating in it for all I’m worth.

And when I fossicked around in why I hadn’t just booked the lesson already, I realized that the only thing holding me back was the little thought:

But what if you book it and then something happens and you can’t go?

Wouldn’t that be too disappointing?

This phenomenon is actually one of my pet hates. It’s the process of robbing yourself of joy and potential in the present moment based on imagined possibilities. It’s a process that keeps you stuck.

Fact: Yes, dealing with ongoing ups and downs can be a tough hand to play.

Fact: Yes, this absolutely produces a hangover effect where you are naturally a bit cautious about getting your hopes up

Also fact: Playing to a negative future possibility when things are actually good in the present serves no good purpose other than to rob you of the good stuff… which is the stuff you have been waiting for as you negotiated your way through all the muck.

So hits a spot with you in some way, look at what’s in front of you and make your future plans based on that reality. The other is nothing more than an imagined projection that’s neither protective nor useful.

Lesson booked.

Onwards.

❤️ Jane

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